Saturday, November 14, 2009

LIVING & Dying--We Feed The Fire

I am a man & men are animals who tell stories.
This is a gift from our Gods who spoke our species into existence but left the end of our story untold.
That mystery is troubling to us all.
How could it be otherwise?
Without the final part, we think, how are we to make sense of all that went before: which is to say, our lives ?
So we make stories of our own, in fevered & envious imitation of our gods.
Hoping that we will tell by chance, what was left untold & finishing our tale, come to understand why we were born.

Sunday, November 1, 2009

FORGOTTEN

There comes a time when one has to look openly at there life & see the truth. I am a man who has not done that for a while. I am to a point destitute, without hope, says alot coming from a person who believes they have always been optimistic beyond reason at times. I suffer from PTSD & it has never been an issue until late. I am about to become homeless, i have done everything i know possible legally to get a job & become a productive part of society. It amazes me that for all i have done for my country that it is so easy for them to forget me. I made one conciuos, moral decision that did not agree with there poilitcal view & i was disavowed, forgotten, just another pawn in there ploy to gain what they need without any consideration for what is right--the proper & just thing to do. As vague as this sounds, the ones to whom this refers to know--i know you are watching-reading--see all i say--to you i say simply this--FUCK YOU. I will always do what is moral & just & if i must become just another ghost in society then so be it--i will never believe i was wrong in my decission--he was a bad man out to do nothing but bring harm to others. He would have still exploited the weak & taken from those who had nothing to give. He was after blood money & i stopped that--to you all i say this is how i stand & will remain--true to the cause, ever avengful to those that oppose fredom as it stands--forget me or i will find you & bring to you that witch u know i can & will. A civilian i am now & seems i will always remain--go your way & leave me or i will find you & bring the lightning you at one time so desired--go your way & leave me or i will come to you as a ghost in the night--the one you trained me to be. Stay your course but leave me be--ho ahhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Sunday, June 28, 2009

REMEMBRANCE

There are times i wonder why i have done the things i have done. I look at this beautiful country of mine and wonder what I have fought for. At times risked my life and almost lost it--more than once. TY to the team I call BROTHER-every one of you will live in my memory forever.If not for your bravery i would not be writing this. We are older and long forgotten by our country. We have been called uncaring yet unselfish,devils even--yet the same motherfuckers praised us--hailed us then denied we existed.
TO MY BROTHERS I STILL HAIL OUR NAMES & THANK YOU. LONG LIVE THE MEMORY OF OUR FORGOTTEN NAME--HAIL TO THE- MOON WOLVES--HOOO AAAAA BROTHERS

MY MISSED TEAMS CREDO

NIGHT HOLDS NO FEAR FOR THOSE WHO SLEEP UNDER OUR GODS--
THEY CARRY US ON THERE WINGS WHILE WE WIELD OUR SWORDS--
DEATH COMES TO ALL- WE BRING IT TO THE EVIL WHO HARM OTHERS--
HO AAAA

GRATTITUDE TO GODS

In the dark of night there are things--
They do not exist yet there in my dreams--
Won't come true but I wake up sweating--
My reality however would astound-amaze and destroy a normal mans mind--
I handle it without a care in the world--i can't even flinch--
It is impossible for me not to believe i have a powerful gaurdian existing just for me--
without them i would not.

Friday, June 19, 2009

HONEST ME

I am a son, a brother, a grandfather, a nephew, a cousin, a friend,an uncle, a father, a young boy and a grown man. I am confident, scared, terrified and excited. I am loving, caring and thoughtful. I am hopeful. I am sick and tired. I am shy and friendly. I am careful and careless. I am broken and whole. I am misunderstood, misguided and mislead. Kinky & sexual yet modest. Sarcastic yet sincere. I am hard working and determined, but a little scared on the inside. I wish on stars and dream my dreams. I pray to my Gods and cry my tears. I smile on the outside, while I'm dying on the inside. I listen to others who won't listen to me. I walk on eggshells and I walk on fire. I believe in passion. I love you and I push you away. I want you but not so close until I know you completely. I am everything and nothing all at once. And all I want is for you to Love Me